The Big Move - August Update

Wow, it has been almost two months since my last blog post! We have been working on renovating our new home for over THREE MONTHS while living with my husband's parents and finally yesterday, we moved in! As per requested by many friends and family, I've finally put together an update along with some pictures to show you the progress!

Here's a little refresher of what the house/kitchen used to look like.

 

Here's a list of the things we have accomplished since we bought our home:

1. Removed wall between living room and kitchen
2. Kitchen tear down
3. Carpet removal from living room and 3 bedrooms
4. Base boards removed from entire upper level
5. Wood floors laid in kitchen (wood floors were already everywhere else, underneath the carpet that we tore out)
6.  Lights wired to each bedroom
7. Canned lighting installed in kitchen
8. Smoke detectors and CO2 detectors installed
9. Trim primed twice, then painted twice on every window and door frame (white)
10. All ceilings on upper level scraped and changed to knock down
11. All bedrooms, living room, kichen and "sitting room" painted
12. All doors removed, painted white, then re-installed with new hardware/handles
13. New white base boards added thoughout
14. Backyard rock removed and transferred to crawl space in basement (AKA: our radon infested death trap)
15. Bush/shrub removal, general clean up in backyard

Here's a list of what we plan to continue to do within the coming months

1. Kitchen cabinets installed (in 1-3 weeks...hopefully!)
2. Replace linoleum entry ways (2) with tile 
3. Possibly add carpet to "sitting room/fireplace room"
4. Paint Dining room table and chairs
5. Tree branch removal (2 huge branches are looming over our house waiting for the perfect moment to crash down and kill us!)
6. "Master" bathroom reno
7. "Guest/Main" bathroom reno

And here are some pictures of the progress we've made!

 

Tearing the wall down (May 7, 2016)

Kitchen's coming out! (May 14, 2016)

Wall and kitchen completely out, wood floor is now exposed.

 

Removing base boards...

 

Wood floor laid in kitchen and first coat of paint on the walls (July 13, 2016)

 
And the painting commences! Andrew working on the guest room

 

 Our room

 

First coat of stain down on the floors (July 22, 2016)

 

Second coat of stain immediately after it was applied. (July 23, 2016)

 

All moved in, this is our gourmet kitchen! (August 13, 2016)

 Someone is feeling very comfy in our new home!

And that's where we're at! All moved in and continuing the projects. More to come soon :)

The Drama of Overwhelm

Wow, it's been a month since my last post. And what a month it's been!

This past month has been filled with all kinds of twists and turns to our lives. Luckily, they've all been good twists and turns! My husband and I have been working on our new house renovations like crazy. It's coming along quite nicely and we're starting to see the house look like an actual home, rather than a massive dump of sheet rock, dust, unfinished walls, and floor boards.

Last year, I had the pleasure of reading You Are A Badass by Jen Sincero. I couldn't find it in the pile of boxes in my in-laws basement to tell you the specifics, but there is a chapter called "The Drama of Overwhelm". I want to talk about that. This particular chapter has run over and over in my head this past year. I'll get to that later...

As far as the house goes, the ceilings have all been scraped and are ready for our ceiling and wall guys (what do we call those guys? Contractors? Tapers? Wall and Ceiling Professionals?) to do the knock down ceilings. Our walls are almost ready for painting, the wood floors will be laid in the kitchen tomorrow, and the rest of the main level will be sanded and prepared for staining this week and next. Next week we'll also start painting the main living space, kitchen, bedrooms and bathrooms. Then, the floors will be finished and then hopefully we can start moving in!!

It's been a whirlwind of a month; going to work during the week, working on the house during the weeknights, fitting in weddings, cabins, and other plans on the weekends. And in the midst of all of this, I decided I didn't have enough going on so I should just get a new job too.

I started my new job a week and a half ago. I have officially strayed away from the Graphic Designer role and have taken on a new undertaking as a Marketing Coordinator at a small, family-owned jewelry company that specializes in unique wedding bands made out of deer antler, meteorite and dinosaur bone. So not only is this a new job, but it's an entirely different role than I have ever been in. Those of you that don't really know the difference, see below:

Graphic Designer: the art or profession of visual communication that combines images, words, and ideas to convey information to an audience. Typically uses a Mac computer.

Marketing Coordinator: Markets products by developing and implementing marketing and advertising campaigns; tracking sales data; maintaining promotional materials inventory; planning meetings and trade shows; maintaining databases; preparing reports. Typically uses a PC computer.

Yeah... so that's completely new. Of course I've worked on marketing teams as a graphic designer, so it's not like I'm going in totally blind, but this is still a new territory for me. I'm no longer working on a mac, which as any graphic designer knows, is catastrophic. Luckily, I have my mac at home so I can continue to keep my skills fresh :). I'm also no longer doing much layout and design/production work either, which will take some getting used to.

I'm not writing this blog post to tell you about the updates on our house renovations, or to complain about working on a PC or describe to you how different this new job is compared to my last job. I usually try to make a point in my blogs and I want to make sure I get to it.

I'm overwhelmed. I have a LOT of changes going on in my life and my brain struggles to keep up. We are renovating a new home, living with my in-laws, taking our dog to puppy/obedience classes, and on top of all of that, I decided to start a new job in a new field. Taking on all of this information and responsibility is draining, exciting, exhilarating and overall, exhausting.

I would encourage you to read You Are A Badass. It's a great book, easy to read and the author is hysterical. Since I can't find my book since I'm currently living out of boxes, I have no other details from the chapter but I will tell you this. The name of the chapter I'm referring to, "The Drama of Overwhelm", says it all. Because that's what being overwhelmed is. It's all drama. Yes, you have a lot going on. We all do. But the way you choose to think about it and the way you decide to deal with the responsibilities in your life is just that. A choice.

This week was hard. I thought, I've bit off way more than I can chew. This is too much at once, too new, too overwhelming. I need to schedule time just to breathe. I haven't seen some of my friends in months. Why did I think we could renovate a home, live with the in-laws, train our puppy, get a new job and do it all with flawless ease? What was I thinking?

And that, my friends, is the drama of overwhelm.

We let all of these things in our lives build up to this mountain of responsibilities. The weight pushes down on our chests like an elephant and we consider these responsibilities a burden and an annoyance.

But step back. Are these responsibilities bad things? Are they progressing you forward and getting you to where you want to be? Will they help you become who you want to be?

In my case, I know my responsibilities are great things and yes, they are progressing me forward in my personal and professional life. But I still get overwhelmed by the amount of time and energy spent on these things. That is why it is so important to step back and do what you need to do for your health and for your happiness.

For instance, tonight I had the option of going to do some more work at our house, or staying home, blogging, drinking wine and catching up on Pretty Little Liars on Netflix. There is so much I could be doing at the house, but obviously I chose the latter. I'm already feeling happier, more energized and ready to finish out my week on a positive note. By taking time for yourself, you're doing you (and everyone else) a favor by relaxing and re-energizing so you can be the best you!

Do what's right for you. Are you tired, exhausted, drained, angry, depressed, anxious or any other negative feeling? If so, you need to pencil in some you time and take care of that shit.

Your friend,

Meg

What I've Learned From Our First Year of Marriage

My husband and I got married 1 year ago today.

Today also marks our 8 years of being together. It's been an amazing year filled with craziness, love, changes and growth.

Here are some of the things I've learned this year:

• Love
  A simple hug out of nowhere is always a good idea

• Listen
  Sometimes we get so caught up in ourselves and our own daily routines. But listening to the other person is more important. Ask how their day went and actually listen. Sounds simple, but this can be difficult when we're distracted by our own thoughts.
  
• Be Patient
  Just because he says he will do the dishes today, does not always mean they will get done today. Just because he says he will clean the bathroom this weekend, does not always mean the bathroom will get cleaned this weekend. If you want it done NOW, that's your problem. Sometimes, things can wait. If there's something you want done now, do it yourself or ask him until he gets so annoyed that he finally just does it :)

• Laugh
  Be silly. Laugh at funny things. Laugh at things that make you mad. When everything seems to go wrong in one day, laugh about it. It makes a stressful day so much easier to get through.
  

• Do Your Chores
  Keep up on household work. Split the chores and decide together when you'll get them done.
  
• Tag Team
  One of you can go to the grocery store while the other cleans out the garage. One of you can take the dog for a walk while the other does the laundry. I'm not a firm believer that the man does the outside work while the woman does the inside chores. We are both fully capable of doing both of these chores (except mowing the lawn. I don't plan on doing that any time soon.) Work together to get your big projects done faster.

• Compromise When It Comes to Family Holidays
  This year, we made his family a priority for Christmas and my family a priority for Easter. We always try to make it to all of the get-togethers around the holidays, but we've learned to make one meal a priority, at the next house we will just have drinks, snacks & dessert.
• Discuss Finances Often
  We decided to sit down at the computer once every couple of months to see where we're at with finances. How much are we bringing in? How much are things costing us? Is there anywhere we can cut back? What are we saving up for? Keeping communication open when it comes to finances is so important. Don't make any major purchases without discussing together first.
• When It Comes to Work...
  Work is work. It's not life. If you had a bad day, discuss it, but don't drag it on for the rest of the night. You only have a few hours together a day. Use your time together wisely. Relax, watch a funny show or play a game to lighten your grumpy spirits.

• Make Plans to Relax
  Life gets busy. Decide on a day that you're going to do nothing but relax for a solid 4-5 hours. We often do this on Sunday mornings. My husband likes to get up early-ish, watch tv and play video games while I like to sleep in, eventually crawling out of bed to have my coffee and pretty much just look out the window while petting my dog. It's so wonderful and recharges us for the week ahead!

• Discuss Your Faith
  Talk about how blessed you are. Talk about how amazing it is that God has gotten you to this point in your life. Discuss your worries and your fears but then remind each other that God is in control. And most importantly, pray for each other.
  
• Go On Dates
  Go out to lunch or dinner and actually sit at the restaurant. Don't go through the drive through. Don't pick up take-out. Go somewhere (somewhat) nice and sit down together and have a conversation without cell phones. It's pretty great. 

• Remember To Do Your Own Thing
  This is something my husband and I have done our entire relationship. We are individuals with different interests. You need to make yourself happy before you can make someone else happy. I like to go shopping with my mom or spend a weekend watching movies and going out dancing with my girlfriends. My husband likes to golf with his brother and go hunting with his dad on the weekends. So do what makes you happy, then come together at the end of the day and tell each other about your day.

• Remember That You're On The Same Team
  You're in this together. Even when you're mad at each other, you both want the best for your marriage and your lives. Try to remember that.

And here's one more special tip. I've asked my husband to provide one thing he's learned this year and he came up with a really good one that I hadn't thought of:

• Be Flexible
  Life moves so fast and things are always changing. Be open to change and stay flexible.

I hope you enjoyed these special tips. We're no marriage experts but we sure do know how to love. We're so lucky to have had amazing family and couples in our lives to look up to. Here's to many more years of life and love together!

Your friend,

Meg

Homeless... kind of

My husband and I officially sold our town home and are moved in with his parents. We close on our new home in just TWO DAYS! Excited is not a big enough word to describe how we feel.

Although the closing of our new home will be here soon, it has not been the easiest road to get here. We looked at 25+ homes before we found the one that was perfect for us. There were a few times when I was ready to make an offer on a home but my husband wasn't. There were times when HE was ready to make an offer on another home, but I wasn't. This process has definitely tested our patience with not only trying to find our home, but with each other.

In March, we found a home that we both loved. It was a rambler with 3 beds, 2 baths, a two-car garage, a fenced-in yard with another two stall garage in the backyard for boats, toys, etc. and a basement that was mostly finished with lots of room for improvements. The upstairs needed a lot of work including new floors throughout, a new kitchen and updates to the bathroom. Since there was a lot of work to be done, and the home was on a busy street, we felt the asking price was too high. We decided to go in quite a bit lower with our offer. The seller came back with a counter offer just $2,000 under their asking price (we asked for almost $20K under the asking price). Needless to say, this home didn't work out for us.

After searching and searching, our realtor told us about a home that just came on the market one day. We went to see the home the next day and immediately decided to put in an offer. The home was a rambler in a quiet cul-de-sac in one of our favorite cities in Minnesota. There are 3 beds/2baths a large fenced-in backyard for our pup, a 3-season porch, and a huge unfinished basement. The home was listed at a great price, and since this was a home with multiple offers, we needed to go in with our highest and best offer. We ended up asking $12,500 over the asking price, and our offer was accepted!

After our inspection, we learned that there were a few things that needed to be repaired/replaced in the home. Items such as outlets, smoke detectors, insulation in the attic, etc. We had a radon test done in the basement which ended up with very high results, due to a crawlspace exposing the earth to the inside of the home. Here's the lowdown on radon:

• Radon is a gas that you cannot smell, taste or see. 
• Forms naturally when uranium, thorium, or radium, radioactive metals, breaks down in rocks, soil and groundwater. 
• People can be exposed to radon primarily from breathing radon in air that comes through cracks and gaps in buildings and homes.  
• When you breathe in radon, radioactive particles from radon gas can get trapped in your lungs. Over time, these radioactive particles increase the risk of lung cancer. 
• Radon is the second leading cause of lung cancer after cigarette smoking.  

Sounds tasty, right? Wrong. Radon can be removed from the home by installing a radon mitigation system which can cost upwards of $1,500. When a test like this comes back, buyers always ask the sellers to take care of the problem before they move in, and the sellers do. Usually.

After the inspection, we asked the sellers to drop the price of the home by $2,500 to cover the cost of the mitigation system and the other things in the home that needed attention. They responded with a swift, "No thanks." and immediately our excitement over a new home turned into disappointment.

Keep in mind we had already offered $12,500 OVER the asking price and the sellers still refused to go any lower. The previous owner of the home was an elderly woman who passed away, leaving the estate to her children, 1 woman and 2 men. I was told that the woman was making the primary decisions in the case of the home.

We really wanted the home so although we were angry and upset, we decided to move on with the closing process. After a few weeks I just couldn't take it any longer. I did research about radon and what the standard procedure is for removal. After multiple websites told me, "The seller should cover the cost and get this fixed before you move in," I decided to write the sellers a letter.

I told them our story; How we can't wait to move into the home, our puppy will finally have a backyard and we will get to start our family here. I explained how rare it is for buyers to cover the cost of something that is so hazardous to their health when moving into a new home and politely asked them to reconsider covering the cost of just the radon mitigation system (forgetting about the other things in the home that need to be replaced for about $1,000). I included pictures of us, our puppy and thanked them for reconsidering.

After a couple of days, they finally responded with, "You're getting a really good deal on the house, so our final answer is no."

UGH!

There are things in life that I just don't understand, one of those things being inconsideration. 

Inconsiderate: [in-kuh n-sid-er-it]: without due regard for the rights or feelings of others. 

I felt completely baffled by the idea that even though we were paying so much more over their asking price, they were choosing to be so greedy and not considering the standard selling procedure or the health of the people moving into their home.

Being someone who often cares a little too much about what other people are thinking or feeling, this is something I could not wrap my head around. There are things in life that I just will never understand and if I've learned anything in my adulthood so far, it's that life isn't fair. Things happen for no reason all the time, and you have to just deal with it.  In this situation, I could let it affect me, cry about it, yell, scream and rant on and on about it.  Or I could say, You know what? This is ridiculous. I will not let this situation ruin my day. I've done everything I can to express how I feel and after rejection (twice), I will not be a victim of this person's greed. I will be the bigger person here and choose to move on with my life.

At the end of the day, I am proud of the person I am. I am proud of the person my husband is. If other people choose to disregard our feelings or well-being, that's ok. We'll survive. You're not always going to be treated fairly in life, but it's how you deal with it that shows your true character. It's not easy, but practice turns to habit and habit turns into a lifestyle. Choose this lifestyle.

Since we got the home under our budget, we have room for some renovations. After discovering that there are wood floors under the carpet in the living room and bedrooms, we've decided to remove the carpet, refinish and stain the original wood floors. We will also be removing a wall that separates the living room from the rest of the home, creating an extremely open floor plan. This will make the space feel completely different, I can't wait to see how it looks when that wall is gone! After the renovations are complete and we're all settled into our new home, all of this home-selling, home-searching and home-buying drama will be behind us, and the road we traveled to get there will have been SO worth it!


Your friend,

Meg